Now Loading
by NeonClockwork
Summary: A collection of Vocaloid Oneshots by yours truly, the first six of which were originally posted on VocaloidOtaku.  The stories range from K-T.
1. File One: Dell's Bad Day

CRUNCH! CRASH! 

"SorrySorrySorrySorry!"

Thats how this all started.

"What is going on out here?" Dell yelled.  
>Stepping out the door, he walked right into KIAIKO, one of his fellow roomates, and another VOYAKILOID. <p>

"Ow!" she squeaked, falling on her butt. 

"Whoops. Sorry about that." Dell said, looking down. 

"Its okay, I'm used to it." KIAIKO said. She had a point. Her and her twin, KIAITO were two of the clumsiest people he's ever met. So much so, their creator gave them a first aid kit as their character item. 

"What is going on?" he asked her, as he pulled her to her feet. 

"Uhm, I think the Kagamime twins ran over Haku's scooter." 

Dell sighed. That was probably as much Haku's fault as it was those blonde headed devil twins. 

He made sure KIAIKO was aright, then walked over to survey the damage. Behind him, he

saw Deruko chit-chatting with Luka Megurine. Probably about Gakupo and how useless he is. 

Or something like that.

As he neared the wrecked scooter, he noticed MEITO was over. 

But judging from the look on his face, not even he would be able to fix it.

Kneeling down, he saw Len walk up to him. 

"SorrySorrySorrySorry!" he continued.  
><em>jeez, doesn't this kid ever stop to breath? <em>he thought.  
><em>Of course not. He doesn't need to. Duh. <em>Dell mentally kicked himself for that.

"Okay, what happened?" Dell asked. "And will you get off my car, KIAITO!" 

The VOYAKILOID looked over at him, swinging his feet like a kid. "Rin and Len ran over Haku's scooter. I thought you would have figured that out by now."

Rin turned to Dell. "You're lucky the RoadRoller isn't damaged, I'd have to sue you for destrction of property!" 

Dell shot her a dirty look. "Hey, you ran over the scooter first. If anything, I should be sueing you."

Rin went back to checking the RaodRoller without another word, unlike her twin, who was still prattling on.  
>"'tSeeItSorryDellPleaseDon'tBeMadYouCan''tMeanIt..."<p>

What girls see in him, I'll never know. Dell thought to himself.

"So, MEITO, what do you think?" he asked. 

The genderbend shook his head. "That steamroller-" 

"_ROADROLLER_!" Rin interrupted. 

"Whatever. It flattened the scooter pretty good. I don't think its salvageable, let alone fixable." he concluded.

That wasn't what Dell wanted to hear. He did not have the time, nor the patience to buy a new one.

Just then sf-a2 Miki showed up with Gachapoid, Yuki, and Yukito Kaai, sreeching somthing about airplanes and running in a circle like a moron. 

(Note, I love Miki and I don't think she's a moron. Dell just doesn't like fun.)

At the same time, MEIKO came out of the Cryptonoid's house and confronted Haku. 

"I seem to be missing five bottles of sake. You wouldn't happen to know anthing about that, would you?" 

"What? Ah, me? N-no! I don't know what you're talking about!" Haku said.

Haku is a terrible liar.

Dell thought back to last night. Haku had been out for some time, and when he heard her come in last night, he thought he heard the clanking of alchohol bottles. 

He didn't think much of it, at the time. Haku often forgrets things whn she gets drunk, and will sometimes buy more alchohol, thinking she is out. 

One time, she forgot she was drunk, and spent the day acting very proper, if not slightly British. 

But thats a different story. 

Dell as jarred out of his thoughts by a high pitched wail. 

Thinking one of the kids scraped their knee, or whatever kids cry about these days, he looked in the direction of the noise. 

Only to find that it was Gakupo Kamui. 

Whining like a little girl. 

While and actual girl - Gakuko to be exact - was attempting to calm him down.  
>And she was failing.<p>

"Hey! Will you knock it off, you baby!" Tekuno shouted out the window at his Vocaloid counterpart. "Some of us are trying to play Tetris!"

Neru Akita joined the insanity later, stopping by to talk to Miku. 

About something pointless and time consuming. Dell was sure of it.

Trying to regain his train of thought, he reached for his pocket, only to find his cigarettes gone.

That was the last straw.

"WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP!" he hollered.

Well, everyone did shut up.

"Miki..." Miku said. "I thing you should let the kids rest a bit." she jerked her head in the direction of the AHSloids house.

"But we want to play some more!" Gacha said. 

"Yeah! I want to play hide and seek!" Yuki added. 

"Oh. hide and seek, yeah!" Yukio agreed.

Miki... Miku said again.

Thinking quickly, Miki remembered something.  
>"Uh... oh! I made some cherry cheesecake today, and I was hoping I could share it with you. But if you'd rather stay outside, I guess I'll have to eat it all myself."<p>

"What? No! We want cheescake, too!" The three children ran towards the AHSloids house, Miki following. 

When the doors and windows were shut, and Miku could hear Gachapin and Mukku blasting from the television, she turned to the Kagamines.

Just one look from Miku sent them off as fast as the RoadRoller could go. Which was actually pretty fast, considering the thing was souped up more than Big Al's sports car.

Haku Approached Dell, whose face was the same shade of red as her eyes. 

"Dell?" Haku said quietly. 

"Yes Haku?" he replied through gritted teeth. 

"Ah, I f-found your ciggarrettes t-today..." 

Reaching in her back pocket, she took out a small white box, and a red lighter.

"H-here you go..."

Snatching them up, Dell immediately lit one and took a big inhale.  
>Only to find that they reeked (and tasted) of old sake.<p>

Dell dropped the alchohol-soaked cigarettes and ran straight to the bathroom, where he promptly threw up. 

"Tomorrow, I'm staying in bed." he said, before throwing up again.

That night, Iroha had some 'Hello Kitty' movie blasting from the AHSloids house, Luka and Gakupo were fighting, Tekuno was yelling at is PDA and the Kagamines were arguing about who had to wash the RoadRoller. 

In the moring, Gakupo was found naked in a tree, a large hole was made in the AHSloids house, destroying the TV and Iroha's movie, and the RoadRoller was found hotwired at the bottom of a nearby lake, with Tekuno's PDA jammed in the tailpipe.

Dell was oddly happy that day. 


	2. File Two: Haku goes OOC

**Description: **Haku gets drunk. So drunk, she actually forgets how drunk she really is.

* * *

><p>*ding dong*<p>

Haku walked into the diner like she did every day at this time.  
>Except today, something was different.<p>

For one, she was wearing a top hat and a monocle.

"Hello, Haku. The usual bottle of sake, today?" Luka asked from behind the counter.  
>A look of horror crossed Haku's face. "My dear Miss Megurine, how dare you suggest I would drink something so appalling!"<p>

MEIKO looked up from her seat. "Did you just turn down a drink? What is wrong with you?"  
>"Madame, I would never touch my lips to something so disgusting. Anybody who does must be very low on the social ladder." Haku responded with a wave of her hand.<p>

"Well _excuse_ me, Miss prim and proper." MEIKO shot.

"Okay, okay." Luka calmed her, before her temper took over. "So what would you like?"  
>"A cup of tea, and some crumpets."<p>

"Crumpets?" Luka asked, confused.  
>"Google it, m'dear."<p>

_You did not just say that. This isn't some British tea joint._  
><em>Go ask SONiKA to for your stupid crumpets.<em> Luka thought.

Outside, she plastered on a fake smile. "Sorry Haku, we don't have crumpets. But we do have tea. Would you like Jasmine, or Green Tea?"  
>"Jasmine, please." Haku said, completely oblivious to Luka's growing rage.<p>

At this point KAITO decided to chime in. "Haku, are you feeling alright?"  
>"Quite lovely, KAITO, why do you ask?"<br>"You're acting strange."  
>"Of course I'm not. I am simply going about my day as I always do.<p>

Luka handed Haku the tea. "Enjoy." she said.

Haku took a sip, and spat it out.  
>"Auck! Hack!" she coughed.<p>

...

"What's going on? Why do I have a monicle, top hat, and a cane?" Haku asked, visibly confused.  
>Looking around she spotted Luka. "Oh, hello Luka. The usual, please."<p>

Que group facepalm.


	3. File Three: AAHH!

**Description: **After a bit too much drinking, Luka and KAITO wake up to... each other. But its wasn't _totally_ their fault.

* * *

><p>"AHH!"<br>"AHH!"

AHHHH!

"What the hell are you doing in my bed, you perv!" Luka screamed.  
>"ME? You're the one with her hand around my waist!" KAITO screamed back.<p>

"I was raching for a knife to stab you for putting your hand in my boobs!"

"I thought you were MEIKO!"  
>"I thought you were Gakupo!"<p>

...

"You're sleeping with Gakupo?"

"SHUT UP! **SHUT UP!** _**SHUT UP!**_" Luka screamed again, beating KAITO with whatever was nearby.

"OW! STOP IT! Do you want to wake the whole house?"

"...oh shi-"  
>"CRAPCRAPCRAP!" KAITO hollored over her.<p>

"Get out of my bed!" Luka ordered, kicking him forcefully.  
>"This is my room!" KAITO hollered back.<p>

"No its... whose room is this?" Luka stopped. Pale blue colored walls, grey sheets, blue rug... this wasn't her room.  
>Thats when she saw it.<br>On the bookself.

A NEGI PLANT.  
>NEGI.<p>

"Fu- "  
>"LUKA!"<p>

"Shut up you moron, can't you see we've been duped?" She said, pointing to the negi plant.  
>"So what? Its just negi-<em>ooooh<em>..." realization had finally dawned on KAITO.

"THAT GIRL IS **DEAD**." Luka said getting up. Unfortunately for KAITO, she was in her undergarments.  
>Which meant he was on the ground with a broken face within a second of her realizing this.<p>

"Lugah yew gant hit Migu, shesuh minur" KAITO said, using his (conveniently nearby) scarf to stop the bleeding.  
>Which wasn't working, by the way.<p>

"I CAN, _**I WILL**_, AND SHE'LL RUE THE DAY SHE MESSED WITH ME."

"Yew mite wunna put un sum glothes furse."  
>*crack*<p>

"OWW! Luga, wuddud yew duh dat fur?"

Later that day, after some (not so) manly sobbing from Gakupo, and some reconstructive surgery for KAITO, Miku was found by Teto and Defoko, upside down in the park, hanging by her ankles.  
>A bloody Len Kagamine was found nearby, presumably a victim of Rin and Neru.<p>

A note was attached to a negi, impaled into the ground like a post.

It read:  
><em>You've been warned.<em>  
><em>DON'T TRY THAT AGAIN.<em>

_With Love, Luka and MEIKO_

Below it in different writing was:

_PS: If Len isn't awake by the time you get down, take him to the hospital. ~Neru and Rin_


	4. File Four: Piko, You Player!

**Description: **When our favorite singing androids return to school after a long weekend, we find out that some had more fun than others...

* * *

><p>*rrrrrring!*<p>

"Oh, oh, lets sit here!" Miku said loudly, dragging a surprised Sakine in with her.

"M-Miku, chill out!" She tried to say as Miku pulled them to the aformentioned seats.

"But I want to sit near the window! The main characters of TV shows always sit near the window!"

"Wh-what?"

Meanwhile, not everyone was as happy as Miku.

"SF-A2 MIKI! YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT I JUST SAW!"

A furious Iroha Nekomura stormed in to Miki's class, dragging a terrified Piko Utatane behind her.

Len, Neru, and Rin were in a corner of the room, observing this.

"Is that Iroha?"  
>"Yeah, and she looks pisse-"<p>

"Rin!" Len shouted.  
>"What?"<p>

"Don't swear in school."

"Its not swearing if its true."

"That... made no sense. Anyway, what is she doing in here? I thought she had class next door."  
>"She does, and so does Piko."<p>

"MIKI!" Iroha shouted at her again, finally getting the readhead's attention.

"What, Iroha? Teto and I we're just having a convversation about Cherry danishes."

"Which are delicious, by the way." Teto chimed in.

"Nya, that can wait. You need to hear this."

"What is so important, and why do you have Piko by the tail?"

"I-its not a tail..." Piko mumbled.

"Guess what I just saw him doing?"

"What?" Miki and Teto said in unison.

"I just saw him making googly eyes at Uta Utane!"

"Defoko?" Teto said, shocked. The default girl was nice and all, but Teto didn't think she was all that... _dateable_. Especially with her love for heavy artillery.

"Nya! Yes! He was getting all mushy over her when I walked into class."

"Piko, how could you!"

"Isn't Defoko your cousin or something?" Teto asked.

"Piko! Thats disgusting!" Miki yelled.

"Nononono! My last name is Utatane, Defoko's last name is Utane. I have an extra 'ta'. We aren't related."

"Like that'd stop you anyway, you manwhore!"  
>Miki, Iroha, and Teto stopped to see who shouted. It was Neru!<p>

"Nya, what are you talking about, Akita?" Iroha asked.

The Boukaloid flipped open her phone. "Lookie what I caught while on vacation. Defoko isn't the only one Piko was getting mushy with."

she scrolled to a picture of Piko and a younger looking Red 'loid.

"Who's that?" Miki wondered.

"An UTAU?" Iroha guessed.

"No, I've met all of the UTAUloids. It has to be someone super new." Teto said.

Len and Rin walked over and looked over at the picture  
>And immediately burst into giggles.<p>

"What?"

"Ohohoho, Miki, you are not going to like this." Rin said in between laughing fits.

"What?"

"Well, ah- ahaha!" Len laughed.

"What are you two laughing about?" she demanded.

The twins looked at eachother.

"Well, Miki..."  
>"We have good news and bad news."<p>

"The good news is, we know who it is."  
>"The bad news is..."<p>

The twins said this last parn in unison.

"Thats a _boy_."

Looks of shock showed on Miki, Teto, Neru, Iroha's faces. Piko on the other hand, was plain freaking out.  
>"What are you taking about!" He screamed, gaining the attention of Miku, Sakine (who was massaging her arm socket), and Kiyoteru.<p>

"That's Lui Hibiki."  
>"<em>He<em> is a new Vocaloid that is going to be released later this year."

"He's more of a shota than Len!"

"Yeah, he- HEY! I am not a shota!"

"Oh, Len, you're silly. Of course you are."

"If I'm a shota, than you're a loli!."

"Well, everyone loves lolis." Rin said, giving a twirl.

"But... but..." Piko stammered. "But we kissed!"

...

"Pffft!"

"AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Oh, wow, Piko. How drunk were you?"

"I wasn't. She- he- uh... said I was cute and all, and that they wanted to hook up once they were released publicly. Plus, she had a cute butt."

"And then you kissed."  
>"Kissed him"<p>

"Well, that wasn't all..."

...

"We... got... in bed, and..."

"Oh. my..." Iroha mumbled.

"WE PLAYED TETRIS!" Piko sobbed.

...

"Is that a euphism?" Rin asked.

"A what?"

"She means 'euphemism', Piko." Len corrected. "Was that a euphemism for something."

"No, we really did play Tetris." Piko said. "What did you think I meant?"

"Think about it, dear." Miki said.

"... AW GROSS! NO WAY!" Piko shouted."Get your minds out of the gutter!"

"Well, you were giggling and stuff as you ran off." Neru shrugged. "What was I supposed to think?"

"So, you only kissed?" Miki said.

"Mmhm."

"Well, I suppose I can for give that..." Miki said. "Iroha, you can leave now."

"Thats it? He kissed a boy! _And he liked it_!"

"That's copyright infringement, Iroha." Hiyama said from the head of the room, having returned his attention to grading homework.

"No, its okay. See you later Piko-pie."  
>"Love you, Miki-cakes"<p>

"Ugh, I just threw up a little." Iroha said, rolling her eyes. "C'mon, you." She walked out of the classroom, still dragging Piko behind her.

"Neru, text me that photo."

"Uh, alright." she said, confused.

"Thanks. I have some punishment to dole out. NOBODY messes with sf-a2 Miki Furukawa."

"You have a last name?" Neru said, surprised.

"Well, its my voice provider's last name, so I guess it's mine, too."

"Huh. Alright, then. Have fun with that." she said, going over to her seat, and taking a nap.

Meanwhile, in another part of the city, Lui and Ring were having breakfast.

"So Lui, what did you do this weekend?"

"Well, I met a girl..."

Later that week, on the front page of the daily newspaper, was the picture of Lui and Piko kissing, with the words:  
>PIKO UTATANE EXPOSED! He kissed a boy, and he liked it.<p>

"That's _still_ copyright infringement." Kiyoteru said as he read the newspaper and sipped his coffee.

A faint, and unidentifiable scream could be heard echoing across the city, originating suspiciously near Ring and Lui's house.

* * *

><p>AN: The ending is slightly different on VO, but I like this one, too. Piko is fun to torture.

Poor Lui. I suspect this is why its taking so long for his and Ring's release.


	5. File Five: Story Time

**Description: **A spoiled princess and a dopey, albeit loyal, servant. When Rinto and Lenka are asked to tell a story to Yuki and class, they put their own Kagamine twist on things!

*Bonus points if you can match each character in the story with their 'real life' counterpart in your review!

Here's a start: _Rintopher Lucian d'Autriche_ is Rinto! Aren't I helpful? Winner gets... something. I'll definately think of something. Maybe. I dunno.

* * *

><p>"Rinto! Lenka!" a group of children greeted two blonde teen idols as they entered the classroom.<p>

"Did boring ol' Kiyo ask you to come?" Yuki asked, leading the kids to a carpeted area.

"Yes, and he'd appreciate it if you didn't refer to him as 'Boring ol' Kiyo."  
>The young children turned to find Hiyama Kiyoteru, or 'Kiyo' as most people referred to him, arms crossed and foot tapping. His eyes, hidden by the glare of his glasses, flashed with irritation. His 'daughter' (though they weren't actually related, they were counterpart programs, and he perferred that to whatever crazy fans shipped them as a couple. (an: No disrespect to Yuki*Kiyo supporters, I personally don't support that pairing.)) was always forgetting her manners. Despite being 'out' for almost three years, she still played the 'I don't know much about the world' card.  
>And worse still, people buy it.<p>

Kiyo was lost in thought, so Yuki took over.

"Kiyo-sensei wanted you to read us a story today." she explained.

"Yeah." Gachapoid or 'Ryuto' chimed in. "He had Tei Sukone read to us last week, but..."

"BUT it involved Tei, so things are best left unsaid" Nana Haruka cut him off.  
>Despite her blinding adorableness and 'puppies-and-kittens-frolicing-in-cotton-candy' voice, she was quite the spitfire.<br>A trait most, if not all 'Nanas' in the Vocaloid/UTAU family shared.

"Well, now that we cleared that up," Rinto said "what are we going to read?"

"How about 'Story of Evil'? We tried to get Tei to read it, but..." Yukito began.  
>"AHEM." Nana glared at him.<br>Yukito shut up so fast, you'd think AHS themselves told him to zip it.

Ignoring this, Lenka walked over to the shelf, and retreived the book. Returning to Rinto, the two skimmed the book, using their android brains to do so in seconds.

And promptly chucked it across the room.

"I thought you were gonna read to us...?" a slightly confused and dissapointed Yuki asked.

The twins looked at each other, Rinto getting a vicious glint in his eyes, not unlike his counterpart Rin. Lenka got one too, but like Len, it was less evil and more creepy.  
>The children - and Kiyo - all took a step back, half expecting a piece of construction equipment to barrel through and destroy the place.<br>Instead, Lenka began to speak.

"Yes, we did promise to read you AkunoP's story, and we WILL. But that book had it ALL wrong."  
>"We'll tell you how it really went." They said at the same time.<p>

"There once was a kingdom in a faraway land. It was called the 'Kingdom of Yellow' because of the yellow stones to build the castle town." Rinto began.

"The kingdom was ruled by the beautiful Queen Allison XIV, whom most referred to as 'Big Allie' because of her impressive stature. The King, Andrew III was often referred to as 'Spicy Andy' because of his love for fiery dishes. They were graced with one child, Rintopher Lucian d'Autriche, a boy with hair like spun gold."

"Aww, thanks sis!" Rinto said, playfully punching his sister.  
>"Though it was slightly greasy."<p>

Collective eyeroll from the children.

"Anyway..." she continued, "Rintopher was well off, even having a personal servant assigned to him at age fourteen. Lenkabelle Abberine was her name, and she was extremely loyal to her charge. However, unbeknownst to the Servant and the Prince, the two were actually blood relatives - twins in fact - Lenkabelle having been adopted by the King and Queen's trusted knight, Lan of Scarlet."

"Okay, hold up." Yuki interrupted them. "You mean to tell us that Mothy originally had cast you and your friends, but changed it to the Cryptonloids, LEON, and Sweet Ann?"  
>"Duh." Lenka said.<br>"Alright, then..." another eyeroll from Yuki, and she was done. For now.

"Where were we?" Rinto asked. "Oh, thats right."  
>"Rintopher was also an esteemed horseman. His steed, Joseph, was the greatest in the land, known for his flowing amber mane..."<p>

"Who just so happened to be named after that thing?" Yuki asked, pointing out said thing: an orange steamroller parked outside the window.  
>The twins had insisted (which in Kagaminespeak means 'threatended to level the building and flatten Kiyo's car.')that it be parked outsid the room where the can see it.<p>

"Total coincidence, we swear." The two had their left hands raised. Their right hands behind their back, fingers crossed.  
>"And its not a thing, its a RoadRoller" Lenka added.<br>"What. Ever." Yuki said.

"Y'know, we can't finish the story if you keep interrupting us." Rinto pointed out.

"Carry on." Yuki said, waving her hand in a 'hurry up' fashion.

"Unfortunately, the King and Queen fell ill, passing away and leaving Rintopher to ascend the throne at a young age. But he was naive, and din't understand how to run a kingdom, imposing heavy taxes and eliminating anyone who stood in his way."  
>"Soon, he became known as 'Rintopher the Tyrant' and was both feared and despised by the inhabitants of the Yellow Kingdom."<p>

"One day, Lenkabelle was out shopping, when she quite literally ran into a peasant from the neighboring Green Kingdom, Mikael."

"You mean Michael?"

"No. Mikael. He was an errand boy for Kei Freesis, a wealthy noblewoman in Elphegort, and often came to the Kingdom of Yellow for supplies."

" 'Milady, I do apologise' Mikael said, retreiving the things she dropped. Although she often wore peasant clothes outside the catsle grounds, Mikael easily recognised Lenkabelle as the servant to Rintopher."  
>"Lenkabelle accepted the apology and the things she dropped, and was on her way, still thinking of Mikael."<p>

"Lenka and Mikuo sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" the kids sang.

"WHAT? NO WAY!" Lenka shouted. "This was totally for the song!"

"MEANWHILE," Rinto interrupted, "Rintopher had fallen for a noble from the seafaring country of Blue, Princess Kay."

"KAIKO and Rinto down by the bay, makin' out all night and day!" the kids started.

"How immature." he glared at them.

"Rintopher called a party with the princess, where the two were betrothed, however, Kay declared her love for another."

"Mikael?" Nana asked.

"That's right." Rinto nodded. "Naturally, this didn't sit well with Rintopher. So, he ordered Mikael dead, and the Kingdom of Green attacked."

"Lan of Scarlet was totally against the idea."

"But Rintopher, furious, had him executed."

"And despite her adopted father being killed, and her crush ordered dead by her hand, Lenkabelle remained loyal, and did as she was asked."

"Or so Rintopher thought."

"Right, Yukito." Lenka confirmed. "Lenkabelle, rather than executing the boy, she hid him in the catacombs of the buring kingdom."

"Alas, his fate was not to live. Mikael perished from the cold and the unsanitary conditions."

"The attack on the Green Kingdom was the last straw for the people of Yellow. They could barley afford bread, and now their Prince has started a war with the Kingdom of Green, and with the Kingdom of Blue allied with them, the Yellow citizens didn't stand a chance."

"The entire country revolted, even Theodore, a long time friend of Lenkabelle found himself against the prince, and therefore, against her. Led by a disguised Princess Kay and an irate Jeramei Abbadonia, clad in his father's old armor. The two would finally get revenge for the wrongful deaths of Mikael and Lan."

"Jeramei was out for blood. The servants, save for Lenkabelle had fled or joined in the revolt. Another servant, a boy named Neil Futapie was leading the angry people straight to the prince's quarters, where Lenkabelle and Rintopher, twins seperated at birth, had taken refuge."

"But Lenkabelle was a clever girl, and devised a plan to save the tyrant prince. She grabbed her peasant clothes and handed them to him. 'My Prince' she said, 'take these clothes and flee. I shall take your place, and none shall be the wiser."

"Rintopher was equally clever. 'But dear sister, your adopted brother is out for my blood. Surely you must know what will happen if you are discovered! You shall be charged with treason of the highest degree, no less! Execution would be your fate even if you are not revealed!"

" 'I am well aware, my prince, but I am your servant first and your sister second. My orders are to guard you with my life, even if it results in my death. Let this be my final gift to you.' "

" 'Very well, but know that I shall never forget this, or you.' "

"And with that, Rintopher fled. Lenkabelle was taken in his place, and was to be executed by guillotine at three past noon in the town center."

"As the crowd gathered, Jeramei led Lenkabelle to her death, all the while knowing full well who it really was he had in his custody."

"Spotting the prince in the crowd, he mouthed the phrase 'for my father' before returning his full attention to Kay and Lenkabelle."

"Kay read Lenkabelle her, or rather Rintopher's, charges aloud. When she was done, she turned to the girl. 'Rintopher Lucian d'Autriche, do you have anything to say on this, the end of your days?' "

"Lenkabelle smirked at Kay and spoke the first words since she was captured, words that she had practiced every day in her head, without an ounce of remorse."

The twins both said the next line together.  
>"Oh, look. Its time for a snack."<p>

"And the guillotine fell."

"Taking Rintopher's tyrant kingdom of evil with it."

The group stood up and streched.  
>"That certainly was an interesting take on the story, kids." Kiyo said, cracking his back.<p>

"It was... alright." Yuki said, reciving a jab in the side from her male counterpart.  
>"Admit it, it was awesome!" Yukito said.<p>

"Well, we'd best be off. We've got a recording to do." Rinto said, waving to the kids.  
>"See you guys later!" Lenka said with a smile.<p>

The sound of their RoadRoller starting up, followed by a crunching sound ment the twins had left, taking a chunk of the concrete barrier with them.

Back the classroom, Yuki glanced at the clock and got an evil smile on her face.  
>"Oh, look. It's time for a snack."<p> 


	6. File Six: New Student Culnoza!

"Yeah, Rinto and I are going to the grade school this afternoon to read to Yuki and the others." Lenka told Rin, smoothing her skirt. Why Lenka wore a skirt, instead of shorts like her family, nobody was sure. "I guess all the other 'loids have to do it, too."

"Huh, yeah." Rin said, yawning. "Unless we're reading something cool, like 'Fear Garden', then why bother?"

"Rin!" Lenka cried. "You know we can't read 'Fear Garden'! Miki won't even let them watch your PV!"

"Did I hear my name?" sf-a2 Miki said, walking into class with Teto and Neru.

"Yeah, Rin want's Rinto and I to read 'Fear Garden' to the little kids, but I told her you don't even want them to see the PV!"

"Is that the one we all had to dress in military school uniforms for?"

"Oh, puh-leeze." Rinto said. "'Kagome, Kagome' is a _much_ better choice. It has kids, and they are kids."

"I will never understand your logic, dear brother." Lenka sighed.

"Alright class, take your seats." Kiyomi Hiyama said. Her and her brother, Kiyoteru, both taught school. But Kiyoteru teaches Middle school, and Kiyomi is an elementary teacher. Sometimes, they liked to swap places and teach the other group. Today is one of those days.

"Ah, Ms. Kiyomi, today is a swap day?" Sakine asked.

"Yep. And I have some great news. Today we have a new student." The class began to whisper. 'Who do you think it is?' 'Is it one of the V3 Vocaloids?'

"Alright, alright." Kiyomi said, tapping on her desk with a ruler. "Everyone, please welcome our new classmate, Ms. Culnoza."

A readheaded girl in a long coat walked in and stood in front of the class, her confidence showing quite well.

"Ms. Culnoza, why don't you tell the class about yourself?"

"Yo. The name's Culnoza, but you all can call me CUL. I'm a V3 from Internet CO. I also host VocaloRevolution."

"Oh! That's right." Miku said. "But you looked so different on TV."

"It's called a costume change, dearie. You should try it sometime." Cul grinned.

"Hey, that wasn't very nice, y'know." Sakine told her.  
>"Aw, get over it, old lady."<p>

"OLD LADY?" Sakine shouted, standing up. "I'm _sixteen_!"

"Yeah, a sixteen year old running on obsolete somftware."  
>"What?"<p>

Cul faked surprise. "Oh, you didn't hear? Yamaha no longer supports Vocaloid1, and is phasing out Vocaloid2. I guess you could call me your sucessor, Hatsune."

"Oh, really? I'd like to see you even _try_ to achive my type of fame." Miku shot back. This girl was like Lily, but with even _more_ attitude.

"Pff, easy. I can surpass you and the super-dying twins over there." She blinked. "Oh, there are two sets of you now?"

"Yeah, there is. So watch it, missy!" Rinto snapped.

"Alright, don't get your panties in a bunch."  
>"What makes you think I wear panties?"<br>"Pantsu nugero mon, that's what."

Rinto huffed and sat down. He hated that song, but as Rin's genderbend, he was pretty much obligated to cover it, much to the amusement of the other Kagamines.

"Okay, okay. Everyone just needs to chill out." Teto interjected. "Aren't we supposed to welcome the new girl, not bite her head off?"

"Thanks, _obasan_." Cul said, sitting down behind Neru, who had fallen asleep.

Teto just nodded and sat down, emotionless. _Obasan_... a middle aged woman...

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

"Ow, watch it, missy!"

"Why don't you?"

The Kagamines let out a group sigh. This was the sixth... seventh...

"This is the eight time you guys have started arguing over something!"

Right, eigth time Cul and Neru have started arguing. Ever since Neru woke up long enough to notice Cul, the two have done nothing but fight.

"Guys, guys, knock it off!" Iroha said from the end of the table where she sat with Miki (who was mad at Rinto for suggesting horror stories to read to kids) and Piko (who was burying himself in his PSP.)  
>"Look, Cul. I don't know why you're so mean to the others. We're all friends. Well, most of us. There is no reason to act like we're all enemies."<p>

Cul looked at the twelve year old and laughed. "Kid, you've got some nerve standing up to me. I like that." Iroha looked shocked. That wasn't the reaction she was expecting. "I'm not enemies with anyone. Its just fun to watch you all get so butthurt over everything."

"Really?" Miku said.

"Really. But what I said earlier still stands. I'm gonna outfame you by miles, Hatsune."  
>"I'd like to see you try, Cul."<p>

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

"Yo, Kiyomi!"

"Oh, hello Lily. How are you?"

"I'm pretty good, thanks. But I'm not here about me. I'm here about Culnoza."

"Oh, Ms. Cul!" Hiyomi nodded. "What do you need to know?"

"I just wanted to know how everyone treated her. Was it okay?"

"Oh, yes. It was wonderful. There was a bit of a spat in the morning, but by the end of the day, they seemed pretty friendly."

"Good. I was worried." Lily admitted.

"You of all people, worried? Lily, your motherly instincts are showing."  
>"Ah-er... d-don't be silly. I'm just curious. If anything I'm worried about everyone else. Cul is..."<br>"She's a lot like you."

"Yeah. Yeah, I suppose she is."  
>"I have high hopes for her, and I'm sure the fans feel the same way. She'll be well loved."<p>

* * *

><p>AN: Aww, Lily cares. How adorable. Yeah, so this is my way of welcoming CUL into the Vocaloid universe.

Cul's a brat. But I Iove her.

Oh, and while I imply here that Culnoza is her full name, CUL is also short for CULture. But my French-speaking aquaintences (and sister) have been mentioning that 'cul' is an obsene word that translates to [ss]. So... I call her Culnoza.

Also, this is my way of explaining why Kiyo is teaching middle school in File Four, but grade school in File Five. Derp. It was either this or clones...


End file.
